It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize