fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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