i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
she looked like the before picture.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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