I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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