The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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