You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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