Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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