I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
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