Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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