Just fell off a train. Bad.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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