So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
