Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Randomize