Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
