loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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