I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
