Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
