Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
