brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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