I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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