imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
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