so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
too bad you live with your parents still
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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