So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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