Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
i need some magic done to my vagina
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Help. Why am I so naked?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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