I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Just invented taco cereal.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
