1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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