Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
