I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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