put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
