Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
