So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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