You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Just cropdusted the office
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize