he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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