why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
