This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize