Sponge bath it is.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
