apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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