Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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