pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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