Do you still have your period?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
