he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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