dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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