"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
im six kinds of drunk right now
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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