How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I wish there were birth control emojis
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
