Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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