so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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