i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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