well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize