I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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