you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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