So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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