David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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